Yearning for something lost

I have never paid attention to such as plants or trees in my young days. It was the mid forties in my life when I all of sudden found they were very close to me. Their lives have become so vivid and intimate to me at that time. Looking back that experience, it was coincident to the occurrence of male menopause. Actually, I have had the symptoms of autonomic nerve dysfunction at that time. It meat that I won't have the vigorous energy for life as in my young days any longer. Loss of that energy has made me head toward the other living things. being with the living things, which might live longer than myself, is a kind of relief to me. I was not aware of that. But at the subconsciousness level, I have become more mature at least with this respect.

I sure feel almost the same thing about liking of music. I used to like serious and complicated music in my young days. However, I am inclined to love more of the simpler and lively music nowadays. A few days ago, when going to sleep, I accidentally chose the Nr 5 string quartet by Beethoven, OP18-5, which was composed in his late twenties. Honestly speaking, I have looked down or thought little of those works composed at the same time with the opus number starting with 18.

What a lively, vivid and beautiful music it was! Of course, not like the later string quartets, it was taken the form of the precedent great composers like Haydn. It still sounds vivid and full of joy of music, I should say, or of life. Except for the dramatic OP18-4, I have paid too little attention to the other 5 string quartets of OP18. Emergence of such early string quartets of Beethoven as an absolute attractor to me may be because of the same psychological dynamics, that is, the attraction of young, lively and energetic things being lost by such an old man as me. Just listen to this lyrical and lively music. OP18-3 D major.



  1. Shin

    I watched the video, it is most enjoyable. As I grow older I also find myself appreciating music I once shunned as being "lightweight". Chopin, Mozart and Dvorak spring to mind. I have discovered some earlier gems of popular classical music which were all the rage at the time. Look for Vivaldi's opera "Catone in Utica" on You Tube. It has some wonderful arias which must have been the pop tunes of the day.
    Even with Bach I find I am listening to the Christmas Oratorio more than his Mass in B Minor. Mahler's later works are listened to less often too, and as for Shostakovitch, it just seems unremittingly bleak.
    Maybe we are regressing to our childhoods!

    1. We love more of those pieces composers made in their young days than our young days. You seem to share the same inclination now. It is interesting indeed. My guess is that we yearn for something,which we are losing at our age, in music or the other things. Hopefully, we are not only returning to that naughty silly age.

      By the way, the condition is getting better. This condition won't continue after this autumn as the forecast says. Just have fun on the air so far as we could.

  2. Shin

    I am glad you are optimistic about conditions this year. So far since 1st January I have only had a few QSOs. I listen to 20m every evening and hear nothing except one or two VKs calling CQ then giving up. Same on 30m. On 40m there are YB and BG calling CQ contest style but no proper CW operators. If it is going to get any worse after autumn I guess that is the end of my amateur radio hobby. I must do other things like playing bridge and community work. All the best


    1. Hi John,

      Recently, Frank W3LPL has posted the following in facebook together with the photo of the surface of the sun not quoted here;

      The first sunspot of Solar Cycle 25, sunspot number 12620 on this image, appeared on December 18, 2016. It has the opposite magnetic polarity of the southern hemisphere sunspots in the current Solar Cycle 24. Sunspots have both north and south poles. Sunspots flip their polarity when the current solar cycle transitions into the next cycle.

      This is interesting news but not an indicator of an early end of solar minimum. Early high latitude, reverse polarity sunspots from the next cycle routinely appear from time to time during the normal course of events of solar minimum. This Cycle 25 sunspot appeared a little earlier than expected.

      Who knows the Cycle 25 would start earlier. Let's hope to go on operating radio. I suspect you are not satisfied with the routine QSO style any longer, though.

      Twenty meters may open at night very soon, even though the path son't be so vigorous as before.

      Don't rush into QRT. You may go off any time you want to. See you soon.


  3. A fantastic concert last Thursday with SSO and Dutoit. Such a pleasure to see how this orchestra has progressed over the years.
    This evening there is a contest on and 40m is alive like I have never heard it before. Many USA stations on air. But at all other times the band is empty. It is the end of CW for me Shin.
    On Tuesday going to south India for a month walking in the hills. Take care Shin and I hope springtime comes soon.

    1. I must say I agree with you as for the end of CW...even though I have told you not to go QRT earlier in this comment chain. I find it a bit surprising that I won't feel stressed not to get on the air due to the mess of contest so far. I could get free from intoxication of this hobby soon.

      Fine on the concert of SSO conducted by Dutois. As I might have told you before, I used to go for a concert of a Japanese orchestra with him on the podium. I can't remember what piece they have played. Something french. He was a young and ambitious conductor while I was the same either. I am glad he is still making his career over there.

      I haven't forgot on this blog. A number of family affairs have kept me too busy to care for it. I would renew it at least once a week or so. Visit here sometime.

      Have a great time in India. You have been a great wanderer around the world. Take care.