It will be my father's 13th anniversary in 3 days. My sister has written to me telling she had been reading the papers for application of pension of military he left to her. It says he has served in the army from 1939 to 1945, that is, from 20 to 26 years of age. His youth, which could have been most brilliant time in his life, has been forced to serve for the military nationalism.
He has been sent to China where he experienced the hell of the war and was almost dying in the battle. It was his regret that Japanese troops had done all criminal behavior to Chinese citizens over there. He has repeatedly told us we had owed much to them. It was his dream to travel Chine for a trip of apology, which did not come true.
Coming back from China, he was luckily assigned to an educational division of the army in this area. It meant he had been spared going to abroad again in the end of the war. Later, he might feel guilty for those having lost their lives abroad on behalf of him.
After the WWII, he has become a firm pacifist. It was due not only to his belief in Christianity but also to his cruel experience during the war. He must face to the problem of emperor system when he searched the cause of the war. It was the reason why the people have approved the invasion to the neighbor countries based on the aberrant idea of elitism. In the present time, studying of the reason why our society, at least, a part of the politics, is heading back to the regime before WWII, I feel we could not go without dealing with the problem of emperor system as a quasi religion which leads us to the nightmare idea of nationalism. I sometimes could not help smiling at myself reading the same kind of books as my father used to and thinking in the same way as he did.
On July 1st 3 years ago, the collective self defense was approved by the government, which has been the purported reason why a nation started any war in the past. Whatever the government might explain of that change in explanation of our constitution, it meant our country would go for war abroad in the future. I often wonder what my father would say about this situation.
Remembering of him, I would do what I could to protest against such movement in the politics. It was a bit muggy morning when I and my wife have been called for his passing by the hospital staff. It has come on all of sudden. How lonely he has felt when passing away. I would take over his pacifist position for the token of my apology for not being with him at that time. It is also important what a country we would leave to the next generation. Even if I could do little for that.