Mahler 9th Symphony and Claudio Abbado

Before going to sleep, I have listened to this symphony for a few days. 

I have posted about this music 8 years ago; here.

Getting older, I feel the theme of this music is getting more familiar or pressing to me.

This is the performance I listen to; Lucern Festival Orchestra conducted by Clauddio Abbado. It was 2010.

Abbado has suffered from gastric cancer in 2000 and has survived it successfully. I wonder how he was doing at this time of the concert. Later, in 4 years from this concert, he has succumbed from the same illness. Was it reccurence or another illness? Whatever health condition he was in at this time, the issue of death must have occupied his mind, I suspect. Once, he used to tell death is existentially an aspect of life. 

In the end of this performance, he has set a time of silence in darkness for a couple of minutes. It seems he has casted a message from the nether world. Reading too much into it?

Cool breeze is coming into the bed room. In otherwise completely silent environment, I listen to this music at midnight.