A memory of university orchestra days

An old tale...

Having admitted the med university, I was busy at the tennis club. Liberal arts studies were not very attractive to me. No professional studies at all then. I was spending slow and free time residing at a dorm in the campus. Talking to friends and sometimes as described later, enjoying primitive ensemble until late at night, I and the room mate used to go into sleep listening some music in our topic or seemingly important to us. We always get up late! in the morning. Sun was shining brightly through the window. With simple breakfast, we again listen to FM radio program broadcasting some classic music. Or some music recorded in cassette tapes. We were making music repertoire with those cassettes. Wearing tennis tennis-wear, I attended the classes around noon. Or exactly speaking, almost in the afternoon. As soon as the classes  were over, I headed to the tennis court and played it until sun set. It was as if the time would go on eternally in the same way as the other silly youngsters spend their precious young age.

Honestly, I wanted to join the orchestra, which was a joint with a women's university. Shyness to girls has made me me hesitate to be a member of the orchestra. Late in fall, the room mate at the dorm suddenly proposed me to join it together. I was almost glad to have someone who would join it with me. No reason to deny that proposal. We went to the club room, which was in the hospital campus in the center of Tokyo. Being asked what instrument I would play, I answered "Cello" without any hesitation. In the summer camp of the tennis club, I happened to watch a program on TV which showed Tortelier playing Bach. I was instantly fascinated at his performance as well as the instrument itself. Without that encounter to cello in the TV program, I could not become a cellist.

I went to the women's university campus to get the instrument they would lend to me. It was late fall. Cold wind was blowing through the entrance to the club house, a tiny shabby cottage, in a pine forrest. Leaves of the trees were fallen. I was nervous since it was first visit there. It was a not virtuosity instrument at all. One of the cheapest models produced by a japanese manufacturer was wrapped with a cloth case. It was still an important instrument which invited me to classical music performance.

I was pleased to have that cello. I still remember how excited I was to get back to the subway station nearby carefully carrying it under my arm. Lesson by the string instrument trainer of the orchestra, who was a cellist at a professional orchestra in Tokyo, has started. I attended to the lesson once a week. Even though I was not very serious learning it, I have finished a text for beginners named Werner's text in 1.5 years. I should have studied scale, bowing or the other basic techniques, as I look it back. Repentance always comes late as the other things in youth! Anyway, in the evening, I always took it out of the case and practised it for a while in the dorm room while the room mate went to the student hall for practice of oboe. 

In several months since I started cello, I have began playing ensemble with friends, even if I was not good enough to play anything yet. A friend of mine, who has become a professor at a university later, has brought Hendel's recorder sonata. A minor sonata in it was impressive. I am often playing it with my wife now. Another guy, owning practice in Chiba now, was proudly playing his old violin. His forte was the 1st theme in the 1st movement of Mendelssohn's concerto. I have never heard him playing more than several bars of that piece, though. I often played some simple baroque sonata with him. Basso continuo was my role. Such fun time seems to be endless at that time.

Practising it at a summer camp. The right person was the part leader pretty good at it. He might be giving me some advice. 

In a year, on my request, my parents have given me the money to buy a new cello. It was not a gorgeous one at all made in East Germany. But it cost as much as my parents earned in a month. I could not be more thankful to them since they have never complained of the expense for that. Unfortunately, that German cello often had a problem in the neck. I have given it up and got a cello which belonged to the club and had been played by a member, who was pretty good at it. It sounded good especially on C and G strings. Deep and beautiful sound. Using that instrument, I played "Apres un Reve" of Faure with my wife at our wedding party later. I wonder who is taking it over in the orchestra now. I would try it again myself.
To be continued, unless any comment says just stop it...

The Song of the Earth by Mahler

There are musical works which we could hardly understand until we reach certain age. It may be a blessing to old age that we could appreciate some profound pieces of music. One of such music for me is "The Song of the Earth" by Mahler. When I first knew of this piece in my early twenties of age, I thought it had been too engthy and even boring. A friend of mine sharing the dorm room with me told what a great work it was at that time. He must already be a precocious guy then. He has particularly loved the last movement of the Farewell.

In the last years of his life, Mahler has tried to seek a relief from death with this music as they always say. Through the aestheticism and pessimism for life, featuring chinese old poems, he tried to reach a frame of mind free from the anxiety and sense of loss in death. In that context, it is an extention of the last movement of his 9th symphony. The words reiterated in the end of paragraphs in the 1st movement typically expresses the basic tone of this music. All after the poem invites us to the pleasures in the earth, it finally says dark is life, dark is death. It doesn't seem to be an indulgence in pessimism. But it tells us what our lives are at the end of them. I could see an openmindedness to death in these phrases. We should accept it as it is. The beautiful earth will go on even after our death.

I don't know if Mahler has been saved with this music for himself or not. In the end of the last movement, as the form the other works of Mahler often takes in, a march, in rather bright tone, starts. The contralto sings "Forever" repeatedly. This part reminds me of the very last moment of our lives when we lose our consciousness. No emotion, anxiety nor suffering from our lives any longer. It is just at the time death arrives on us. Not a salvation from death itself but acceptance of death as it is. Of course, I have never experienced such a near death moment myself but from my past history as a doctor, I have met quite a few such patients. It is an ideal acceptance of death just in my view. Mahler could be in the same idea, if not too far different, as I described above.

Bruno Walter, conducting Wien Philharmony in this recording, has stressed aestheticism of this work. Walter knew Mahler in person and wrote his short biography by himself. Knowing what Mahler was concerned about at composing this piece, Walter might give accent at the aesthetic aspect of this piece.

How difficult it is for me to describe such a music as this one, which belongs to the last thing in our lives. It is not very healthy to be indulged in only these things. However, it might be of value from time to time to come into the world Mahler has developed in this music.

If I could see that room mate, I would ask him how he listens to this music all after our long lives.

Declining or not?

Recently, I have met a couple of old friends, Jim W6YA and Chip K7JA, who attended the Visalia DX convention last month. Both of them seemed to have great time with friends, old or new. I asked them how many young people were there. Both answered to me there had been only two young hams. Chip told me those two young ones were 21 years or younger. One was ZL4YL as Jim told me. Jim seemed very pleased to have her there. She was not a conversational CW operator, though. It was Chip's observation that each middle aged hams in thirties or forties in their age was about 10% of the attendees, respectively.

It was a real nice feast for hams interested in DXing. But I could not help feeling it was shedding the last brilliant light in the history of ham radio. DXing is not ham radio itself but is the main genre which attracted young hams and lead them to be good operators. Reduction of the number of young hams in that genre sure means ham radio is declining in every respect, as it has been repeatedly told. Chip, a 66 year old ham, seemed one of the youngest in the main group in the convention. It means the convention won't be carried out or, at least, would be reduced in size in a decade or two.

In Japan, the situation is rather worse than in the US. In addition to the aging process in the society, there are more bureaucracy which benefits those, private or administrative, hunting concessions. Even JARL is letting them seek concession in ham radio. The former heads, directors or the others, would participate in the concession hunting. The license system is getting more and more complicated and requiring more fee. I am sure it will accelerate the tendency of decline of ham radio in our country.

In order to maintain and progress this hobby, it is a matter of urgence to advocate young people into it. Since the high tech in radio communication and the appearance of the internet environment has come in the society, the situation is quite different from that several decades ago when DXing was the only window to foreign countries. We could not invite youth in the same manner as in the old days. The point is, however, the same as before. It should be something true and not changing in time. Any enjoyment which disappears in some time won't attract young people. We are asked if our way of enjoyment is worth calling them for.

In '60s, we have had a club in the town of Kiyose, a suburb in Tokyo, where I started ham radio at the age of 13 years. Ham radio was a hobby for young people interested in radio communication and in home brewing radio gears. Time has passed. Very few are still on the air in that town now. Could we regain the exciting era of ham radio with young people?

An ensemble with good friends of mine

How fast the happy days are gone! A facebook popup told, on the same day 6 years ago, I had played the piano trio of Faure at a small concert. Of course, with the same two girls. Both of them have been married since then. The violinist would become a happy mother of two children very soon.

When I was doing stably with my own practice, I recalled playing cello for spare time. I was about 50 years old, 18 years ago, then. At first, I wanted my daughter to play with me, who said no way to me for her studies for the entrance exam etc and possibly due to the rebellious phase in her life. This girl who used to learn violin from the same teacher as my daughter did is a professional violinist. She has had training and study in Germany after graduation of a music university some years ago. She has kindly done with me for over 10 years for ensemble. A kind and great violinist.

I miss those days but still feel much grateful to them for letting me play with them. Feeling I am getting worse at performing cello for something of fast passage etc in accordance with aging, I am still practising it everyday. So far, no chance for me to play such a chamber music. I am still dreaming of another chance to play with them.

The 7th anniversary of my mother's passing

In 3 days, it will be the 7th anniversary of my mother's passing. She was 96 years old. Despite of having lived in Christianity belief, she has suffered from many things in her life. In the end years of her life, she had Alzheimer's disease. Losing her recent memory, she still kept her respectable personality.

When we decided not to care for her at home but to move her to a nursing facility nearby, my borther wanted to be with her at his home in Sendai. In a year or so, it turned out to be difficult for him and his wife to go on caring for her. She had been sent in a nursing facility there, where she had had one of the best care available for her. I could not thank more the staff there and my brother/his wife.

She used to be a sharp person. I sometimes wonder what frustration and anxiety for her to lose her recent memory and some aspects of her intellectuality. She has accepted it as it was without complaining anything to the others. Her wish was to come back here and to live with our father, who had passed away 14 years ago.

Even after she has lost her recent memory, when I brought breakfast to her at the house in the same property, I found her praying eagerly sitting at the table. Even though I was not a Christian, it was an unforgettable scene of glory even for me. In her last hospitalization, she was always smiling to the visitors asking about the related people.  Even though she repeatedly expressed her wish to come home here.

On the 1st anniversary, my sister has sent me a poem titled as A Prayer for the Autumn Years of Life, by Heuvers, who had spent many years as a catholic priest in Japan. What is written in this poem was how she has spent her last years of life. I believe she has taught us how to spend the last years of our lives with her existence itself.

I still miss her.

Brahms Piano Quartet Nr.3

This is an excellent performance of this piece. Very accurate in ensemble and full of songs in performance. Each performer is really artistic with amazing capability.
It is surprising that an instant ensemble like this group could perform in this way.

The 1st movement is expressing tragedy in adolescence. Urgence and energy is in the 2nd movement. Delicate song of love is the 3rd movement. I would emphasize the 4th movement showing how unique music of Brahms is as in the case of his Nr4 symphony. Struggle in lonesomeness and meaninglessness of life is expressed in this movement in my view. This music may express every aspect of life from young days to elderly.

I used to play the last movement in med school days. A lecture room equipped with an old upright piano. It was sometime in fall. The setting sun was shining through the window facing to the west. Quiet except for our performance. We have played the last movement, even though we have never known what it had meant in our lives yet. The friends of mine, playing this piece with me, might have lived their lives and must be standing at the almost last chapter of their lives now. For now, they might understand first or even deeper what the music has meant. 

Potatoes and apples are budding

Potatoes are finally budding. I was almost uttering some words when I found this coming out in the soil.

We have planted a couple of apple trees in the garden 3 or 4 years ago. They have bloomed for the first time this year. We have looked forward to their flowers. They may bear first fruits very soon.

It was in my forties when I was first moved by plants growing or betting born. Lives are miraculous even if we know of that process as a knowledge. Older we get, more pleasure we have seeing them vivid and alive. 

I am going to plant various kinds of vegetables. It is for the harvests themselves and for the pleasure to watch lives growing.  

We will have the 7th anniversary of my mother's passing very soon. My brother and his wife will visit and have some time together with us here. Time is still flying away so fast. I would treasure every moment with family members together.